Archive for the ‘Republican stupidity’ Category

Because there’s no difference between Nazis carrying shields and pipes and wearing helmets, and people who punch Nazis.

Seriously. That was his argument. That it was okay for Nazis to beat the shit out of people because the “alt-left” (antifa?) started it by punching some Nazis.

The President.



Because those nasty antifa attacked peaceful white supremacists, as this photo proves:


Y’know, about these anti-fascist “antifa”, I don’t think their tactics are necessarily good or wise, but I can’t find it in me to condemn people who punch Nazis, no matter how much the Nazis whine about being punched. That’s the difference between me and the Orange Racist Russian Stooge, an apple that apparently didn’t fall far from the tree.

— Badtux the Head-shakin’ Penguin

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You’re fired, Scaramucci!.

Scaramucci is *this* week’s reality show loser, as he gets the “Your Fired!” heave-ho on “Presidential Apprentice”. I’d be ROFL if it wasn’t such a sad commentary on the state of our federal government right now.

Ten days. He lasted ten … whole … days.

Somehow, I doubt he’s going to put that job on his resume! “Communications director? Oh no, I just took a couple weeks vacation, hung out on the Jersey shore, I was nowhere near Washington D.C. for those two weeks!” Heh.

— Badtux the Sadly Laughing Penguin

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This time it’s in Kentucky. This glorious example of Republican hypocrisy is named David Narramore, 54, of Whitesburg, Kentucky. His mistake: he crossed the state line into Johnson City, Tennessee (gosh, how appropriate a name!) and waved his teeny weenie at… uhm… a male loss prevention officer in the next stall. Who promptly took him to the loss prevention office and called the cops. Then when the cops showed up, this glorious example of law abiding citizen resisted arrest and had to be tasered and, when that didn’t work, he got his ass beaten down by the cops until they got his tighty whitey self locked, stuffed, and booked.

Sheesh. Are there any of these anti-gay crusader types who ain’t gayer than the gay mayor of Gaytown?!

– Badtux the Baffled Penguin

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The State Department is eliminating its Cybersecurity coordination office. Because we’re apparently secure. Despite all those ransomware outbreaks recently.

Oh joy. We’re gonna get more scammers, more spammers, more break-ins, more of everything annoying on the Internet. It’s like they’re *trying* to destroy the Internet. Like they think the Internet threatens their control, or something.

Oh wait….

– Badtux the Paranoid Penguin

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That’s the only thing I can assume, due to the fact that he blames Democrats for the fact that all of the repeal-and-replace a.k.a. “Trumpcare” proposals in Congress have failed.

What next? He blames Obama? The pope? The final season of Game of Thrones?

Last time I checked, Congress is run by Republicans. Sorry, Deadbeat Donnie. This fiasco is all on youse guys’ hands, not ours. We’re just sittin’ back munching popcorn.

– Badtux the Democrat Penguin

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That’s what a survey just found — the majority of Republicans, 58% of’em, think higher education is bad for America. ‘Cause it teaches you that thare book larnin’, not, like, Bible larnin’. Why, you might even stop thinking that the world is flat and an invisible sky demon makes the Sun rise every morning if you got too much of that thare book larnin’.

Now, you might say, what about the America that send men to the Moon and such? How we gonna do shit like that again if we don got no edumacation? But look. We don’t need colleges here in the United States anymore, ’cause we can hire them thare edumacated dot-heads and chinks to do all that nerd work now, and they cain’t vote ’cause they ain’t citizens so they ain’t gonna be votin’ fer school bored members that let that thare evil “science” and “history” stuff into our classrooms. When everbody in this here cuntry gets Bible Studies all school year long (all five days long of it after the budget cuts come through, ’cause we’uns need tax brakes for our bajillionaire job creators, y’all!), then it’s gone be a Christian nation, like, again, or maybe for the first time if them LIE-berals wuz correct about how our founding fathers wuz Deists rather than Christians but hey, everbody knows them thare lie-berals, they’uns LIE.

And when them thare lie-berals say that our glorious leaders are sociopathic lizard people who view us as prey rather than as people and ain’t got our best interests in their hearts by telling us that this hare edumacation stuff is overrated… well, them thare lie-berals just bein’ mean, y’all. That’s all. ‘Cuz Big Brother loves me, I know it’s true, ‘cuz the television, it says so too, just like my preacher man. So thare!

— Bubba the Suthern Penguin

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“He (the paramedic) was used to O.D. calls by now, except for the ones in which kids were around. He once arrived at a home to find a seven-year-old and a five-year-old following the instructions of a 911 operator and performing C.P.R. on their parents.”

This is the saddest article I’ve read all week. What kind of life are those kids going to have?

A shortage of drug intervention services is one of the biggest problems they have with getting people off of opioids. The supply of addicts who want to “dry out” is far greater than the number of beds. Yet these people (the non-addicts in these communities) almost uniformly vote for the people who promise to screw them (i.e. Republicans), and against the people who promise to do better for them (i.e. Democrats). What. The. Literal. Fuck?

– Badtux the Baffled Penguin

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