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Archive for the ‘Orange Racist Russian Stooge’ Category

Mysterious Glowy Ball stroked by Trump

Summoning the Hellmouth

In Florida today, a Hellmouth opened at Mar A Lago, leading to a leak of petulant orange demons in the past. Because time works in strange ways near Hellmouths.

Before that, the Orange Racist Pussy Grabber was stroking a mysterous glowing orb in Saudi Arabia as his daughter Ivanka grifted $100M from the Saudies for her charity. Rumors that Trump was summoning the armies of Sauron to emerge from a Hellmouth and conquer Earth thus far have proven unfounded. So far. But he made his supporters mad anyhow, because he gave a speech that was, like, sensible and stuff, and didn’t call Muslims demons from hell even once before he finished off the day by eating a well-done Trump Steak slathered in ketchup.

The next day, in Israel, the Orange Racist Russian Stooge accidentally confirmed that he leaked Israeli secrets to Russia. Oops! But he had fun in Israel anyhow. He got to see a wall. It was a YUUUUGE wall. He got to wear a little beanie hat and stroke the wall. He liked that. Rumors that he asked the Israelis how much it cost to build that wall thus far have not been confirmed.

After this, Deadbeat Donnie was beat, and had to go to sleep. But never fear, there’s always tomorrow!

– Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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So yesterday it turns out that Comey took dated notes in his conversations with Trump, like all FBI agents do. And the notes say that Trump asked him, on February 14, to stop the Russia investigation. Comey didn’t. Then Trump fired him. By his own admission, in his tweets, because of the Russia investigation.

Yeah, obstruction of justice. That and $2 will get you a cup of bad coffee at Starducks.

So now the Justice Department — with Jeff Sessions abstaining because he *isn’t* immune to obstruction of justice charges — has appointed former FBI director Robert Mueller as special council to oversee the investigation of ties between Russia and the Trump campaign. Mueller is a Republican who was appointed as FBI director by George W. Bush. On the other hand, he has a reputation as a straight arrow. He refused, for example, to allow the FBI to participate in the CIA / Pentagon torture campaign. So… cue the popcorn.

So now to more randomness…

Russia to America: Don’t read newspapers. Really? Dude. The day that I let a foreign government tell me what to do is the day I renounce my American citizenship and swear allegiance to Hydra. Sheesh.

Trump, speaking to graduating Coasties, spent time whining about how mean the press has been to him. “No politician in history has been treated worse or more unfairly.” Dude. They shot Abraham Lincoln in the head. And he has the fucking nerve to say this after eight years of bigoted racist attacks against President Obama. Whether it was photoshops of Obama’s head on a witch doctor, the current Racist In Chief’s constant insistence that Obama couldn’t possibly be an American and his birth certificate must be fraudulent because, well, he’s *black*, the continual assertions that Obama was a dictator who was gonna take their guns because he’s a big scary black man, the constant racist photoshopping of his head and his wife’s head onto monkeys, etc., frankly I don’t know how the man didn’t snap and start having bigots strung up on the White House lawn. I guess Obama just has thicker skin than the current precious delicate snowflake-in-chief.

Finally: Any half-decent hacker could break into Mar-a-Lago’s poorly secured networks and spy on everything happening there. Including the doings of the Orange Racist Russian Stooge.

But… her emails!

– Badtux the Head-shakin’ Penguin

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James Comey fired. He found out about it from the television while addressing agents at the FBI field office in Los Angeles. Even some Republican Senators and Congressmen think this was unprofessional.

This makes the third person in a row who was investigating Trump Administration connections to Russia who was fired. To count them up for you:

1) Sally Yates. Investigating Trump administration officials’ Russian connections. Fired.
2) Preet Bharara. Investigating corrupt Russian businessmen in New York City who had offices in Trump Tower. Fired.
3) James Comey. Investigating links between Trump campaign and Russian intelligence. Fired.

The troops in Congress are starting to get nervous. Their muttering is even happening out loud now. Is this Trump’s “Saturday Night Massacre”? I guess we’ll see…

– Badtux the Popcorn-munchin’ Penguin

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Circulating around social media…:

“I don’t know – it’s hard for me to see any U.S. ties to Russia…
except for the Flynn thing,
and the Manafort thing …
and the Tillerson thing
and the Sessions thing
and the Kushner thing
and the Carter Page thing
and the Roger Stone thing
and the Felix Sater thing
and the Boris Ephsteyn thing
and the Rosneft thing
and the Gazprom thing
and the Sergey Gorkov banker thing
and the Azerbajain thing
and the “I love Putin” thing
and the Donald Trump, Jr. thing
and the Sergey Kislyak thing
and the Russian Affiliated Interests thing
and the Russian Business Interests thing
and the Emoluments Clause thing
and the Alex Schnaider thing
and the hack of the DNC thing
and the Guccifer 2.0 thing
and the Mike Pence “I don’t know anything” thing
and the Russians mysteriously dying thing
and Trump’s public request to Russia to hack Hillary’s email thing
and the Trump house sale for $100 million at the bottom of the housing bust to the Russian fertilizer king thing
and the Russian fertilizer king’s plane showing up in Concord, NC during Trump rally campaign thing
and the Nunes sudden flight to the White House in the night thing
and the Nunes personal investments in the Russian winery thing
and the Cyprus bank thing
and Trump not releasing his tax returns thing
and the Republican Party’s rejection of an amendment to require Trump to show his taxes thing
and the election hacking thing
and the GOP platform change on the Ukraine thing
and the Steele Dossier thing
and the Leninist Bannon thing
and Sally Yates prevented from testifying thing
and the intelligence community’s investigative reports thing
and Trump’s reassurance that the Russian connection is all “fake news” thing …
and Spicer’s Russian Dressing “nothing’s wrong” thing …
so there’s probably nothing there…
since the swamp has been drained, these people would never lie. It is probably why Nunes canceled the investigation meetings and the Senate now has taken over. All of this must be normal.
…just a bunch of separate dots with no connection.”

Drip… drip… drip….

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A writer for the New York Times tries to figure out how her loving grandmother could have been a Nazi.

Her only conclusion: It required selective vision, a willingness to be blind, a willingness to ignore the evil stuff that was being said and listen only to the good stuff, the stuff you wanted to hear. “My grandmother heard what she wanted from a leader who promised simple answers to complicated questions. She chose not to hear and see the monstrous sum those answers added up to.”

When we have a Russian stooge in office, engaged in regular racist rhetoric, when we have Trump supporters claiming that a dystopian novel written thirty years ago is “a pure propaganda assault on those who are politically to the right and attack against Christianity as well which is typical of the left” (huh, the fact that Trump supporters can connect a story about a fundamentalist totalitarian society to Trump says a lot more about him than it does about us), when we have an administration that, like the Nazis, publishes a list of untermenschen in Der Stormer in order to tar a hated minority as criminals and decided to let a woman die of a brain tumor while refusing to allow her to see her lawyers until Amnesty International raised enough of a fuss that they allowed her release on bond… well, the lesson of Jessica Shattuck’s essay is far too appropriate to these times.

— Badtux the “Nazis again, dammit?” Penguin

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Bonus music: Vera Lynn is 100 years old today!

I’ve been watching nuclear bombs go off. Only on archival footage from the 40’s and 50’s, thankfully, all scratchy and low-def black-and-white. But seems like our current administration, with its focus on the Pentagon rather than the State Department, might make it possible to view nuclear bombs going off in hi-def color. Specifically, if the U.S. ever attacks North Korea, they have nuclear weapons, and it’s likely that Seoul goes up in a nuclear blast a few hours thereafter, Tokyo a few days after that, and San Francisco a few weeks after that. (Hey, it takes *time* to haul a nuke across the Pacific on a fishing trawler!). Because that’s what happens when you threaten the existence of a nuclear power — they figure that if they’re going down anyhow, they’ll take their enemies down with them as much as possible.

Meanwhile, it’s time to revive another word that we thought died with the Soviet Union: политрук . Or “Politruck”, or “political monitor”. These are political officers embedded into government agencies to monitor loyalty to the regime. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that the Orange Racist Russian Stooge is using an old Soviet tactic to ensure that the government apparatus is loyal to him, but it does make his Russian connection look rather … obvious?

Talking about which, FBI Director Comey testified to Congress and verified that there was, indeed, an investigation into the connections between the Trump campaign and the Russians — but, unlike with the Hillary investigation, he refused to discuss details. Because IOKIYR, I guess.

Finally, expect a new distraction shortly. Only 39% of voters now approve of Trump’s performance in office. The good news for Trump is that it won’t get much lower, or at least it won’t get lower than 27%.

The sad thing about the prior link is that it’s from 2005, and could be discussing the current President just as much as it was discussing President Bush back then. Progress. 😦 .

– Badtux the Dejavu Penguin

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Every morning, I open up my web browser wondering if today is going to be the day I don’t say “What the fuck?” about something that His Fraudulency Donald the Trump or one of his lizard people officials said or did. Today, once again, was not that day. Because a) the Orange Racist Pussy Grabber released his proposed budget for next year, a budget that predominantly eliminates programs that help Trump voters such as Meals for Wheels and the Appalachian Regional Commission (and what kind of heartless sociopath could ever advocate zeroing out the budget for Meals for Wheels and Sesame Street, for crying out loud!), but he also proposed spending $4.1 billion on his wall next year. Because people might die due to eliminating the Chemical Safety Board, but by god it won’t be done by one of them Messicans!

Talking about which, the Chief Justice of the California Supreme Court has demanded that ICE stop stalking California courts, claiming that ICE is intimidating Hispanic witnesses in ongoing criminal trials and causing a public safety hazard. ICE of course says basically “up yours, Ms. Judge, you’re not the boss of me!”. Just as Customs and Border Protection says to they don’t have to obey the NAFTA treaty that says registered nurses qualify for a TN visa and thus can keep out much-needed Canadian nurses because, well, they can. Even though NAFTA is still the law until officially repealed or renegotiated. But God-Emperor Donald the Trump’s administration doesn’t care about no steenkin’ law, it’s all defiant juvenile “you’re not the boss of me! I don’t have to follow your rules!”. Because Cheeto Mussolini says they can. So they do it.

Then there is the ongoing Nazi saga of Sebastian Gorka, who has been dodging allegations that he is a Nazi for weeks now. Well, today a Jewish news magazine published what they purport is evidence that he really is a genuine bona fide Nazi, forcing him to explicitly deny that he’s a Nazi. Except that if he was ever a member of that Hungarian Nazi Party, he is ineligible for immigration to the United States, and could be stripped of his citizenship and deported, just like that sad sack Nazi who’s about to be deported to Poland. Oops!

And on to the Russia front. No wonder Michael Flynn resigned — he was up to his ears in Russian dough.

Finally, I think we’ve found Donald Trump’s next Peace Corps head — a Mormon missionary who beat the crap out of two people who tried to hold him up in Brazil. Because Trump is defunding the Institute for Peace while giving the military more money because the only peace he believes in is the peace of the grave, and this is exactly the right man to enforce that peace.

And that’s this day’s dispatch from the Imperial States of America, where God-Emperor Donald the Trump’s regime of lawlessness and incompetence continues as it has for the past 56 days.

– Badtux the News Penguin

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