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Archive for the ‘Orange Racist Pussy Grabber’ Category

Mysterious Glowy Ball stroked by Trump

Summoning the Hellmouth

In Florida today, a Hellmouth opened at Mar A Lago, leading to a leak of petulant orange demons in the past. Because time works in strange ways near Hellmouths.

Before that, the Orange Racist Pussy Grabber was stroking a mysterous glowing orb in Saudi Arabia as his daughter Ivanka grifted $100M from the Saudies for her charity. Rumors that Trump was summoning the armies of Sauron to emerge from a Hellmouth and conquer Earth thus far have proven unfounded. So far. But he made his supporters mad anyhow, because he gave a speech that was, like, sensible and stuff, and didn’t call Muslims demons from hell even once before he finished off the day by eating a well-done Trump Steak slathered in ketchup.

The next day, in Israel, the Orange Racist Russian Stooge accidentally confirmed that he leaked Israeli secrets to Russia. Oops! But he had fun in Israel anyhow. He got to see a wall. It was a YUUUUGE wall. He got to wear a little beanie hat and stroke the wall. He liked that. Rumors that he asked the Israelis how much it cost to build that wall thus far have not been confirmed.

After this, Deadbeat Donnie was beat, and had to go to sleep. But never fear, there’s always tomorrow!

– Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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It got up to 94 degrees today. Pretty darn hot for no air conditioning. The good news is that it’s supposed to cool down tomorrow. Phew!

So, I got an alert that one of my drives in my RAID array failed, and when I got in I found that three of the drive bays in my 12-bay NAS unit had died, degrading my ZPOOL too. Well, three drives don’t die at one time, so I rebooted the server, went into the LSI BIOS, and swapped three known good drives into those bays. Still nada, they wouldn’t even blink red. So I did what everybody would do in that situation — I grabbed a backplane off the pile of backplanes behind me that I’d scored off of eBay, and swapped it into the system. The “bad” drives then came back online, added themselves back into the appropriate arrays (with a bit of prompting from me), voila. Hoarders for the win!

So, what’s happening in the world today?

Well, yesterday in 1945 the Red Army hoisted the Soviet flag over the Reichstag, which many historians consider the symbolic end of the Third Reich or, as Steve Bannon calls it, “a temporary setback.”

Jeff Sessions doesn’t like being laughed at. So he prosecuted a woman who laughed when someone said “Jeff Sessions has a well-documented record of treating all people equally under the law” (his actual record is that he’s a raging bigot), and successfully convicted her of disrupting Congress, a crime which carries up to 1 year in Club Fed. Just by comparison: Brock Turner spent 3 months in county jail for raping an unconscious girl. But laughing at a white racist is a more serious crime than raping an unconscious girl, right? Right?!

Talking about rape, Donald Trump just hired yet another person accused of sexual assault by multiple women, Steven Munoz. Because birds of a feather and all that, I guess.

Finally, the Dutch have a good precedent for what to do with a failed leader. Unfortunately applying their lesson to a certain orange racist pussy grabber would result in a lot of heart attacks from eating so much fat…

– Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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World Nut Daily, which introduced the false claim that Obama’s birth certificate was a fake, claims that liberal witches are casting spells against Donald Trump by, amongst other things, sticking pins into carrots. Which doesn’t seem to be working. Maybe we need to stick pins into Cheetos instead?

No, I’m not joking about these people believing in witchcraft. These people are demented. I am just completely bogwumped by the notion that anybody in this day and time believes in real actual witchcraft… ooh, and demons. Can’t forget the demons, which liberals are apparently literally throwing at Trump. Best comment at that link: “Well the demons aren’t doing much bloody good, and I’m getting exhausted painting pentangles and rectangles or whatever the hell to summon them up. We obviously need better bloody demons.”

To which one of my friends replied on my Facebook page, “sweetie, they believe in a magical invisible being to whom they pray to and who NEVER FUCKING ANSWERS. Of course they believe in witchcraft and demons.”

Gah, the stupid, it burns, it burns!

– Badtux the Bogwumped Penguin

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I’d like to wake up just one day without opening the Google News web page and exclaiming, “that fuckhead Trump did WHAT today?!”. Today, alas, was such a day.

Canada’s Girl Scouts refuse to come to America. They’re afraid that CBP will keep some of their girls from crossing the border due to national origin or race, and additionally are concerned that their girls might be subjected to searches that would constitute sexual misconduct and result in prosecution in Canada. Yay, the Orange Racist Pussy Grabber’s policies helping the US economy, woot!

Muslim Ban II has been stayed by a court in Hawaii. There is essentially only one way to get in and out of Hawaii, and that is by aircraft. The state apparently argued that the ban was going to harm their tourism industry while providing no additional security. Well, yeah, that it will, just as it encouraged the Girl Guides to avoid the US.

So I understand that His Fraudulency Donald the Trump held a rally in Nashville today where he repeated his usual lies, where his acolytes saluted their God-Emperor with the salute with which he is most familiar, thanks to his neo-Nazi advisor. I have selected the best of the photographs of this event:

Trump Rally in Nashville

Horse soring was banned by law in 1970. That’s a cruel practice where horses are tortured in order to make them high-step. Regulations to enforce the ban have never been adequate though. That was fixed in the last few months of the Obama Administration but for some reason the final rule never got published in the Federal Register. The Trump Administration has now kept that regulation off the books for 55 days, refusing to enforce the law prohibiting soring. So let me get this state. When Obama refused to enforce the immigration law for young people who’d been brought here before 10 years of age and were law abiding, that was bad, according to the Republicans. But it’s okay if Trump does the same thing about animal cruelty? Well, at least some Republicans are calling BS on that too…

But of course it might not be malice, it might be simple incompetence. A friend of mine has recently received multiple inquiries to be hired by a federal agency that shall not be named at various of their locations as a seasonal worker. Apparently seasonal workers aren’t covered by the hiring ban, as long as it’s no more seasonal workers than were hired the previous year. He notes that the place he’d prefer to work isn’t hiring seasonal workers because, despite the hiring ban, somehow they’d managed to hire ten full-time workers. All we could do was shake our heads. None of the Trump appointees at the top in that department has the slightest idea what they’re doing, so all the underlings are running wild and doing whatever they want to do. The children shall play while the adults are away, and all that. Nobody gives a shit anymore, everybody figures they’re fucked anyhow so just do what they want. Apparently Bannon’s oft-stated goal of destroying the Federal government is well underway…

Trump advisor who contacted Russian hacker at least 16 times during 2016 campaign now claims that the CIA tried to kill him in a fake auto accident. Uhm, no. A typical Mafia ploy is the fake auto accident — hit the guy you want to off, get out and pretend you’re going to exchange insurance cards, but instead put a bullet between his eyes. If the CIA wanted Roger Stone dead, he would be dead. But hey, Alex Jones says it was an attempted assassination, so whatevs…

And finally, pointing out that our President is orange isn’t racist. Racism is where you are attacking someone for something they were born with, i.e., skin color, ethnicity, hair color, whatevs. As far as I know, the only thing ever born with orange skin grows on a tree and is used to make a tasty breakfast juice. Trump chose to be orange, he wasn’t born that way. And making fun of people’s stupid choices… isn’t that the American way? FREE-dum and all that?

– Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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… quit proposing Nazi policies like genocide. Yeah, some fine MAGAts in Maricopa County (Arizona) proposed liberal genocide and deportation of the Jews to save America for white people. Thereby proving that Maricopa County is one of the Orange Racist Pussy Grabber’s strongholds. Yay, Arizona.

Meanwhile, Paul Ryan literally flunks the answer to the question, “what is insurance?”. The answer to that question, of course, is that insurance is risk pooling. Let’s take leukemia. Leukemia is pretty rare, but when it happens, it costs $1,000,000 to cure it. So if leukemia strikes one in 10,000 people in a given year, then 10,000 people can each put $100 into the pot, and the lucky individual who comes down with leukemia gets his leukemia treatment.

Here’s the point: Yes, the healthy people are paying for the healthcare of the sick person with leukemia, but that’s because they didn’t know at the beginning of the year whether they would be the one person in the pool who came down with leukemia. So they pooled the risk — they put $100 into the pot so that if they did turn out to be the one person who came down with leukemia, they would get the health care they needed instead of dying. The whole point of a risk pool is that the people who don’t “win” the leukemia lottery end up paying most of the costs of the person who does “win” the leukemia lottery, so that if next year *they* are the one who “wins” the leukemia lottery, their leukemia treatment will be paid for too. It’s basically gambling, but gambling with the purpose of reducing overall risk rather than increasing it. The fact that 9,999 people don’t “win” the leukemia lottery doesn’t make it theft, no more than with any other lottery. It just means that if they play that game again next year and they *do* “win” the leukemia lottery, their health care is paid for.

What happens if you *don’t* have risk pooling? Lots of dead bodies. Because the vast majority of the people who do “win” the leukemia lottery every year are not millionaires like Paul Ryan and thus don’t have the personal resources to pay $1,000,000 for treatment. That’s why they joined a risk pool — to pool their money with other people so that if they *do* “win” the leukemia lottery, there’s enough money in the pot to pay the bill. That is why both the American Medical Association and American Hospital Association are both against any plan that reduces the number of insured people — uninsured people generally die when they don’t have the $1M to pay to cure an expensive illness. But the thought of dead bodies apparently gives Paul Ryan a woodie…

Yeah, if you don’t want to be called a Nazi, quit proposing policies that end up with dead bodies. Just sayin’.

– Badtux the Bodycounting Penguin

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I now have paperwork all over my office, because of course one stupid piece of paper wasn’t in the folder where it was supposed to be and I had to sift through practically the entire contents of my filing cabinet to find it.

The good news is, my taxes are filed, and I don’t owe any more money than I paid. Wasn’t a good year, wasn’t a bad year, I’ll take it.

Meanwhile, I have a new term to talk about: “goysplaining”. This is when a pasty white Protestant male attempts to tell Jews the correct way to condemn anti-Semitism and the correct way to identify and fight anti-Semitism. Yep, Trump representative Spicy-Spice Spicer went there. Because the Trump administration knows more about fighting anti-Semitism than the Anne Frank Center, apparently.

Oy!

– Badtux the “He’s *not* a mensch” Penguin

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So, Donald Trump has basically said everybody is deportable. Well, not those of us who are US citizens. But if you aren’t? Well.

There’s a problem with that, though: California farmers are going to lose their work force. At which point defenders of their God-Emperor Donald the Trump whine, “there’s a farmworker visa they can use to get the labor they need!”

Really? Let’s go look at that visa, the H-2A Temporary Agricultural Workers visa:

The current H-2A Temporary Agricultural Workers visa works fine for states like North Carolina that have an actual growing season and a specific set of crops requiring a specific set of skills. Their association of North Carolina agricultural producers named as a joint employer can hire H-2A workers then allocate them to farmers on an as-needed basis during the growing season, then send them home at the end of the growing season. But that doesn’t work at all for states like California that have a year round growing season with wildly varying labor requirements based on what’s happening at any given moment of time. H-2A basically allows an agricultural worker to be here in the US for, practically speaking, 9 months out of every year. California has a year-round growing season. H-2A also requires the worker to be employed in agriculture for a single employer for the entire time. But California agriculture is “bursty” — a farmer will need a hundred workers to pick the lemons over a two week period of time, then a dozen workers to prune the lemon trees afterwards. During the time that California agriculture doesn’t need workers, workers travel to other Western states to commit random acts of agriculture there, too, or work construction or other jobs while waiting for the next burst of labor to be needed, or simply sit unemployed for a few weeks between agricultural jobs. This would not be permitted under the H-2A visa.

The reality is that California agriculture is reliant upon Mexican migrant workers. We don’t have another workforce available with the level of flexibility of the current workforce, which is constantly shifting around or periodically unemployed as the farmers hire the workers they need when they need them then let them go at the end of the need. Americans today seem to lack the intestinal fortitude to give up their stable comfortable life and live the migrant life. Heck, they lack the intestinal fortitude to deal with change at all, see, e.g., the resistance to the fact that the city of Santa Clara is changing as migrant technology workers move here. Does anybody really think that a people that throws a hissy fit over a four-story apartment building changing their city’s skyscape is going to be able to deal with the change needed to follow crops around the state of California picking, pruning, and weeding? Yeah. We’re fat, comfortable, and self-entitled. Not happening. Not even if the Mexicans all get deported. How many readers of this post are going to move out to the Central Valley and start picking lemons and strawberries once the Mexicans are deported, then move northwards as the growing season moves northward, then back south as the growing season ends in the north? SNORK! Yeah right. That’s for *other* people to do. And I’ll add myself to that number saying “that’s for other people to do”, because I’ve done hard physical work outdoors in 100 degree summer heat before, and at my age have no intention of doing it again.

So yeah, Trump’s about to fuck all of us. Because California grows most of the nation’s fruits and vegetables. Hope you like potatoes, Kansas, ’cause you ain’t gonna see any fruits or vegetables for a *long* time if the Orange Racist Pussy Grabber gets his way.

– Badtux the Former Farmer Penguin

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