Woman beats a public school teacher with a brick, putting her in a hospital, because said teacher took a phone away from her girl. The 10 year old girl allegedly bit the teacher when the teacher took the phone away from the girl.

Yeah, why the fuck would I want to put up with violent and disorderly parents ambushing teachers? Is it any wonder that we have trouble retaining good teachers, when at any time they could be physically attacked by parents upset that the teacher disciplined their precious little snowflake?

– Badtux the Not-teacher Penguin


Another one on Faux News. John Garofalo, 72, did some pro-Trump artwork and claimed to have served seven years as a Navy SEAL during Vietnam with numerous commendations and medals. Turns out, however, that he was lying. He was an aircraft handler — one of those guys wig-waggling the pilot to direct him where to park his plane, and moving planes around on the ground so they could be maintained. He never served in Vietnam. He never was awarded any medals. It was all a lie — a lie so that he could seem like a tough guy down at the VFW, I guess.

What I don’t get is this: What’s the point? When my dad got out of the Navy, he was happy to tell people that the only reason he joined the Navy was to avoid being sent up Hamburger Hill in Korea with a rifle in his hand, and he spent the entire war bobbing safely in the middle of the Pacific in a submarine tender, cooking spuds to serve to squids. He was happy to talk about his adventures — snorkeling in the crystal clear waters around Midway and the gooney birds there that made the whole place a giant shithole as well as made aircraft operations hazardous, a knife fight in San Diego, adventures in Tijuana — but combat? He wanted no part of that, and never claimed to want part of that. Not because he wasn’t an asshole — he was an asshole of major proportions, abusive and negligent in equal measures and ridiculously racist. But he just never had the need to blow himself up that way into something bigger than what he was. He may have been small-minded, but he wasn’t that kind of small-minded.

Not like Garofalo. Or like another person that I know of who has done much the same thing, claiming that injuries he got from an auto accident actually happened in combat, claiming that he was a SEAL when he was actually a cook at a Navy base, that kind of thing. Just baffling.

– Badtux the “WTF is with these people?” Penguin

Donald Trump calls the mother of a dead soldier a liar a day after he told his widow that her husband “knew what he was signing up for”.

What an ass. Even George W. Bush of “Heckuva job Brownie” fame wasn’t that kind of ass. I mean, fuck. Donald Trump makes George W. Bush look good? How fucking bad is that?!

Meanwhile, Mr. Trump: No, when I walked into that recruiter’s office, I wasn’t signing up to die. I was signing up to, hopefully, make sure the nation’s enemies died. A bit of a difference there….

– Badtux the Military Penguin

So, I turn the corner to go into the urinal, and there’s already somebody there. He’s a recent college grad in his early 20’s. His hands are on his hips, and he’s spraying away. Think about a fire hose for a minute, people. Think about what happens if the fire fighters drop it. Picture that in your head. Now, think about what’s happening in our restroom. And now I know why it’s so disgusting all the time…

But… why did he do this? Why didn’t he hold his firehose and keep it aimed at the urinal? Well, a quick pass through that sewer of the Internet, Reddit, swiftly turned up the answer. In the college dorms, if you hold your hose while urinating, people laugh at you and say you’re masturbating. So to be manly, you have to spray all over the frickin’ restroom. What. The. Fuck.

But the urinal squirters (and their toxic femininity counterpart, the toilet squatters, who’ve been described to me by female acquaintances) are only one aspect of people so insecure about their sexuality that they have to make a big frickin’ mess in the restroom. At least their mess stays in the restroom. Then there’s the shitty assholes.


Men who literally don’t wipe their asses because touching themselves between the cheeks might make them gay.

The tales are a combination of unhygienic living (skidmarks on everything, always, including the bedsheets after lovemaking; the smell is unbelievable) and abusive, reactionary men who blow up at the suggestion that they should be wiping and washing their asses.

Jesus fucking Christ on a goddamn stick, what a bunch of shitty fucking assholes! Literally!

I don’t get it. Why are so many men so insecure that they can’t even fucking hold their dick or wipe their ass for fear of being thought gay? Why are so many men so insecure that they have to harass gay people, for that matter, in order to prove to themselves that they’re not gay?

Most of these men are not gay, people. I’ve never met a gay man who wouldn’t shudder at the thought of skid-marked undies or pee-puddles on a bathroom floor. All I can think is that they’re just sad, sad wanna-be men who lack even basic consideration for anybody around them, nevermind for themselves and their shitty drawers (literally). Ugh. So disgusting…

— Badtux the Disgusted Penguin

Sexual harassment.

There’s a lot of women tweeting “#MeToo” to signify that they’ve been victims of sexual harassment. Much fewer men, and for most of them, it was when they were young and not full grown. Women report sexual harassment at all ages.

There are men who are regularly harassed but these are men who are gay or trans for the most part and don’t “look” right to those who have a certain image of masculinity. I’m not sure whether to call this sexual harassment or not. The main difference as compared with the sexual harassment that women endure is that the goal of the harasser is not to have sex with the person being harassed, but, rather, the goal of the harasser may be to submerge or deny his own desires to have sex with the person being harassed. That is, the harasser is trying to *avoid* sex with the person being harassed despite an obvious attraction (because I mean, who obsesses about gay sex except gay people? Closets, folks).

But the one commonality here is men. Too many men are dicks. Pure and simple. Just sayin’.

– Badtux the Harassment Penguin

The most dangerous place for a reporter to be in America today is at a protest. Not because they’re attacked by protesters. Rather, because police officers regularly attack the press at protests and regularly destroy their equipment. 1st Amendment guarantee of a free press? The Constitution is just a piece of paper, right?

Meanwhile, even when reporters do get the story, media outlets are afraid to print investigative reporting about oligarchs because the oligarchs own the courts and can put them out of business.

Indiana proposes licensing only “responsible” people to be reporters. Presumably any reporter who dares report on a protest or reports things the oligarchs don’t want reported is “irresponsible”.

And of course the Orange Racist Russian Stooge keeps trumpeting that any media critical of him is “fake” and his deplorable followers regularly threaten reporters.

Combined with the fact that most reporters now aren’t full-time staffers of newspapers, they’re part-time stringers for wire services who don’t have access to the legal resources of a major media outlet, and you get a serious issue where proper reporting is being suppressed by the government and the government’s supporters.

One of the first things that fascist regimes try to do is shut down any media that’s critical of them. Erdogan has done that in Turkey, and it appears the deplorables and their God-Emperor Donald the Trump are bound and determined to see that happen here too. Because remember, people. The Constitution, and the 1st Amendment that it contains, is just a piece of paper.

Or is it that the Constitution just has one paragraph, the 2nd Amendment?

So confusing!

– Badtux the Press Penguin

Out of the shadows

Hope Sandoval has spent most of her career in music in the shadows. Literally, in the shadows. As in, not allowing the house lights to be turned on, not allowing a spotlight to be turned on her, not allowing cameras or videotaping…. she spent most of her career hiding in the shadows.

But there was one time when she could not hide.

It was 1994, and Mazzy Star agreed to play the Bridge School benefit concert. The concert was scheduled for mid-afternoon, and the Shoreline Amphitheatre is an open-air venue. And there was a camera crew filming everything for the benefit concert tape that was going to be sold for further revenue.

The result was shy and beautiful.

– Badtux the Music Penguin